Hydrogen for President | Page 27

[The standard periodic table sits in the background. A frown is drawn on it.]
Oxygen: Let’s face it, our dormitory looks like some sort of textbook diagram!
Oxygen: It needs a complete makeover!

[Oxygen points at the viewer.]
Oxygen: So I present to you…
Oxygen (shouting): The Academy 118 dorms, 2.0!!

[Oxygen grandly gestures towards an image of Stowe’s alternative periodic table, which consists of seven floating diamond shapes.]

[The audience applauds.]
SFX: CLAP CLAP CLAP
Oxygen: See, if we put really really big magnets in the ground and build the rooms out of metal…
[Oxygen continues rambling. Hydrogen shoots the audience a look that screams “I can’t believe you’re buying this crap.”]